A Personal Post.........

Today's post is going to be slightly different and it's a bit of a personal one.......i guess i just needed to get this off my chest as my family don't seem to understand. I did a post (here) on this topic a while back, so please feel free to read it.

Over the last few years the pressure for marriage has intensified a lot and it seems that many members of my family are trying to push me towards marriage. I don't know if it's because I'm the eldest and my parents are seeing my cousins (who are younger than me by the way) getting married, as well as starting families.

Personally, it feels as though this pressure is too much. I'm trying to distract myself with work but it's always on my mind. Hence why i haven't really been blogging or uploading videos to YouTube. To my parents, it looks like I'm failing because I'm not married. They can't seem to see the other things i have achieved in my life without a husband. A husband doesn't make you who you are!

I guess this post is on what should i do? Should i just give in and have an arranged marriage or should i wait for the right guy to come along?! At the moment i am extremely confused and also conflicted between culture, religion and also my wishes.

Do i want to get married? Of course! However, it's something that you can't rush (in my head anyway) and i want to be with the right guy that I'm compatible with.

Sometimes i despise all this cultural expectation and how it can almost ruin a girls life. Why can't parents be happy with their child studying, working and being independent? Why does everything always lead back to marriage and starting a family? I feel that's all I'm made for......to get married and pop out kids.

I feel that some asian parents can have such a traditional way of thinking and sometimes it's like back the f**k off! I want to actually achieve something in my life and not just settle. Living at home doesn't help the situation at all, i get lectured on a daily basis. It's actually gotten to the point that my parents are asking relatives to speak to me, trying to make me understand the importance of marriage and how i need to settle down because of my age.

To be quite honest, it makes me feel like utter crap. It seems as though i can't enjoy my life, being single and free, and everything has to boil down to marriage. I don't know if it's just my parents, or if there are others like that out there?! I've wanted to make the most of being single and doing all those things that you can do! I don't have any major responsibilities and i want to enjoy all the freedom, whilst i have it. I know that when people get married and have families, life changes.

I guess this post is just about me rambling on and trying to write down what's going on in my head. I would love to get some advice or hear about if anyone else has been in similar situations?

This post isn't meant to offend anyone, it is purely what is going on in my life at the moment, so thank you for taking the time to read this.